I looked over the edge of the canyon. It was a steep 200-foot drop down a red wall. One of the members of our group threw a rock over the edge, and we didn’t hear a crash for what seemed like a really long time.
“We’re supposed to rappel down… that?” I asked.
“Yup! It’ll be awesome!” our guide Eric cheerfully replied.
Though I’d already completed one rappel, and had been rock climbing in Joshua Tree a few months prior, this looked far. Our guide reassured me that fear was totally normal — that if you weren’t afraid of heights, you were stupid. (If that’s the case, I’m Einstein.)
And as it turned out, much of my trip to Zion National Park was a battle with this particular fear (which I’ve dealt with before).
Hiking Up to Angels Landing
First, the rappelling, and then our hike up to Angels Landing. The pamphlet said the hike wasn’t appropriate for people with acrophobia, but Tim insisted they were exaggerating — and that I could do it.
I try to be open to anything when traveling, so I agreed.
The first part of the hike was great. Beautiful views, perfect weather, good workout.
Then we reached Scout’s Lookout, a flat area popular for picnics, and the real hike began. Welcoming us was a sign stating that, due to steep falls, six people had died on this trail in the past 10 years.
I took a deep breath and proceeded.
The “trail” became a series of boulders to be maneuvered over and around — all while balancing yourself by holding on to metal chains bolted into the ground.
Though my legs started to shake a little bit, I kept going. I was bolstered by the fact that several other people also looked fairly terrified. (At least I wasn’t the only one!)
At last, we arrived at a flat area, which I assumed was the top. A sense of achievement flooded over me as I took in the stunning views.
“We made it!” I exclaimed, slightly incredulous. Only… we hadn’t. Another lady ruefully looked at me and laughed, saying: “I thought the same thing.”
She then pointed further up the mountain, where I could clearly see a skinny trail snaking back and forth. Tiny people marched up and down in single file, gripping on to the chains so they wouldn’t take a tumble down one of the sheer cliff faces.
Um, What?
Even worse, the trail to Angels Landing only fits one person at a time, so I could see little traffic jams where ascending and descending people were trying to pass each other.
You’ve got to be shitting me…
I’d come this far, however, and I wasn’t going to give up now. While saying, “Don’t be a wuss, don’t be a wuss, don’t be a wuss,” over and over to myself, I set foot on the narrow path.
Annnnnnd I got all of about 20 feet.
That’s when I looked over the side and saw nothing but thousands of feet of vacant space. The breeze had picked up into a gust, and fast-walking-suicide-wishing people had started to line up behind me.
NO WAY, JOSE.
I turned back around. I didn’t care if I was a wuss or if I was letting my fear get the best of me.
I didn’t care if Channing Tatum was naked and handing out free Newfoundland puppies and ice cream at the top. I wasn’t going any further.
After arriving safely back at the flat area, I told Tim I’d never been happier to NOT do anything in my entire life. Usually, I suffer from severe FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), but not in this case.
I happily sat there and ate my snacks while enjoying the view from solid ground. We made our way back down (which was a million times harder, btw), and I managed my fear pretty well. (That is, until Tim had to point out a “tiny bus!” about a zillion feet below us. NOT cool.)
Don’t Be a Hero
Travel is about pushing yourself — but it’s not about being a hero.
Go ziplining, eat bugs, try scuba diving, and explore a new country by yourself. Whatever gives you a bit of a good tingly rush. Don’t get on motorbikes with strange dudes, walk down dark alleys alone, or use the ultra-budget skydiving company.
To stay safe and happy, don’t do things that don’t feel right.
I’m not saying I would’ve died if I’d kept going, but I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. I had great views from where I was, and I was satisfied with what I’d accomplished. I didn’t make it to the top of Angels Landing (nor do I think I ever will), but I’d pushed myself. Initially, I didn’t want to go on the hike at all, and in the end, I got farther than I thought I would.
And that 200-foot rappel?
It turned out to not be scary at all. As Eric promised, it was actually kind of awesome. No matter what, rappelling was much less scary than rock climbing (during which my legs were trembling so much I felt like a human jackhammer).
Or maybe… maybe I’m just getting braver.
I’m curious: Would YOU have done the Angel’s Landing hike?
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Essential Zion Info
Watchman Campground: Beautiful, quiet, and right in the park. Super clean bathrooms. Convenient bus service through the park. Be sure to pick a spot with shade! Cost: $16/tent site.
Red Desert Adventure: Their 1/2 Day Canyoning Adventure was a brief, but fun, introduction to canyoning. Our guide Eric is one of the founders and was really informative. Cost: $110/person with a group of four.
Recommended hikes: Angels Landing (even if you don’t go to the top, it’s a gorgeous route), The Narrows (didn’t do this, but I heard it was amazing), Emerald Pools + The Grotto (easy hike with some nice views — though the pools are not exciting!)
Recommended restaurants: Go to the grocery store and cook at your campsite. We tried Bit & Spur (okay) and MeMe’s Cafe (eek); we wouldn’t go back to either.
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Seeing your photos, I think I had reacted the same. I’m not really scared of heights but of precipices. I cannot see people who go to far to the edge. So I guess I’m the wrong person to hike to the Angels Landing as well. But be proud of yourself that you’ve tried. You absolutely made the right decision.
Thanks, Stef! I think I am scared of both heights AND precipices. Haha how useless am I?!
I love this post!! I went to Zion with some friends a few years ago. I wanted to do this hike, but they didn’t (maybe they knew something I didn’t know, haha!). I’ve been wanting to go back since and do the hike. After reading your account, it sounds way more challenging and scary than I thought. I still want to try though. And I agree that what’s important is trying your best and conquering fear, just a little at a time!
Thanks so much, Anna! Love your comment. If it’s something you want to do, you should definitely give it a shot! As evidenced by this post, you can always turn back around if it’s not the right hike for you. xoxo
Wow, that looks absolutely terrifying. There’s nothing wrong with making the decision that it’s not for you! I’m not sure what I would’ve done in that situation. Often times my pride gets the best of me but there’s no sense doing something if you don’t enjoy it. Although in Chile I signed up for a canyoning trip that I was SO afraid to do. On the way there we got stuck in a a huge traffic jam and didn’t think we’d make it, and I was secretly relieved. But then cars started moving and we actually got there and wound up doing it. It ended in a 200 foot rappel down the side of a waterfall and even though I was shitting my pants during it, I had such a rush afterward and wound up loving it! But you’re right, it’s really all about knowing your own boundaries and you still accomplished a lot by going as far as you did! Kudos! 🙂
Ha! Great story, Kaleena. I so know what you mean about secretly hoping it won’t work out — but I’m so glad you ended up enjoying it! That sounds like an amazing trip too. Rappelling down a waterfall?! I am so excited to go and read your post about driving a car in Korea…
The park looks awesome! Never made it there when I was in the area last year, so hopefully next time 🙂
Yes, you’ll have to go! It is gorgeous.
That looks like a fun hike! I probably would’ve loved the last scary bit, but I agree with you that we don’t always have to do everything just because the opportunity comes up. I once went on a hike under a waterfall in Honduras (which was awesome), and afterwards people were jumping off a cliff into the river, probably a 30 foot drop. It wasn’t even that I was scared so much as just not interested. The risk/benefit calculation I did in my head was just far weighted to the possibility of hurting myself over any fun I’d have. The other guys teased me a little but I didn’t care, I was cool with walking away.
Yay! Good for you, Robb! xo
I loved this post, it’s a wonderful perspective, thank you. Like you, I’m all for pushing my own boundaries and it’s served me very well over the years (doing things like getting my open-water dive ticket & mountain biking down the Road of Death in Bolivia) but it’s great to be reminded that somethings can be a step too far & not to think of that as a personal failure. We’re planning a trip to Zion Nat Park in September & I’m super excited about it, but I get vertigo (sometimes even standing those 2-step kitchen step-ladder things) so just looking at pics & posts about Angels Landing make my stomach churn & calves go like jelly. Reading your post reminded me not to overthink it, I’m still keen on the first 6km, but if I decide not to push-on from there I won’t allow myself to feel like I’ve failed. Love your work! I’ve also got good advice that the East-rim trail to observation point is worthwhile too & potentially less crowded.
Thanks for the kind words, Liz! I really appreciate it. It sounds like you’ve done some pretty extreme adventuring, and I bet you’ll love Zion. But YES, remember that even if you don’t get to the top, it’s ok. You were still there, and you still had a new and fun experience!
Zion NP is stunning but unfortunately extremely overcrowded. You can drive along Highway 9 but must take the shuttle up the Virgin River canyon. You pick up the free shuttle at the visitor’s center. Good luck getting a parking spot at the VC. If you get there after 10, more than likely you will need to park in Springdale and take that shuttle to the VC, then transfer to the park shuttle. The shuttle makes 6 stops in the canyon. I would suggest riding it to the top stop and then working your way back down. EVERY bus we were on had people standing. Even with all those people, Zion is not a place to be missed! Highway 9 is beautiful but the Virgin River canyon is unbeatable.